A smile and a tear

Therez this strange thing about relationships...the ones that go to be a memory , belonging to the past.Each one of them leaves behind moments to cherish or lessons for life.

No relationship really ends...a part of it we carry with us every day and onward,whether it is a familiar phrase instilled in us , a poem shared, a tiff over a bite of chocolate, the name-calling, that silly secret.I believe that this is the way it works.Else we would all be as open as when we started out and as unexposed to goodness or pain.

No, I dont say that with every awry relationship we shrink.It is just that we become a little more prudent about letting people or relationships influence us to the hitch.

I know getting hurt is inevitable, but to hang on to the pain or not is about personal choice.It is simply that I tell myself to give my best to the thing that is in front of me and then, when it is dusk, be happy for the day which gave me the mirth to bask in.A tough one I try to teach myself...but worth it.Life is more complete.

Sure life is beautiful...what else can give me a smile and a tear at the self-same spell of time :-)

Appreciation Day

Today itz Appreciation day at work.What came to my mind was this:

"To those of you who have pushed me, thank you.
Without you I would have fallen.

To those of you who laughed at me, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have cried.

To those of you who just couldn't love me, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have known real love.

To those of you who hurt my feelings, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have felt them.

To those of you who left me lonely, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have discovered myself.

But it is to those of you who thought I couldn't do it;
It is you I thank the most,
Because without you I wouldn't have tried."

~Author Unknown

A snap-shot of me I

I continue to surprise myself on how gracefully I take my lessons with life .Just that, heart of hearts, I wish I dint have to take them..the real tough ones.Then again ... I know they are good for me. I need to grow , get better , gentler, stronger ...

I know I can rest for a while and then, move on I must.Staying behind is not a choice I give myself.

So move on I will, with my lessons in my heart :-)

Short story 1

Thanks to Ammani,I ve finally took to trying my writing skill.

So, this is lead line for i ask you write - 10:

Somewhere in the dark recess of that wooden cupboard, there is a photo album. And somewhere the middle of the album is a photograph of Vaijayanti. She's leaning against a tree, looking up at something and smiling. What is she looking at? When was this photo taken?

And here is my 50 paise:

Itz more than two decades since that day had met itz dusk , but my memory of it still shines through.Vaiju...the angel-next-door, known as Vaijayanti to the rest of the world , wore a saree for the first time.Not that she was of contemporary or tom-boy make...she was one of those delicate souls who would blush at even the slightest glance.A loud word from her is something I ve not heard of...since our childhood days.

By virtue of my profession I was the chosen one to catch a glimpse of her through my nikon.The damsel, draped in a saree,
toddled her way into my backyard and I zeroed-in on my favourite mango tree for the spot.Smile was her language and she needed no prompting on that .Just when I was done with the shoot , she looked up at the sky and smiled ...she spotted a garudan, an auspicious sight ... an good omen for her marriage under discussion.For me that spelt a beautiful memory etched on my film.

The omen was true - she is curled up in her baby-like sleep , as I flip through the album , on this warm sunday noon.

A lesson for life

We pick up lessons from strange places...the back-seat of an auto, an unfair deal , a spider , a babe ,a tsunami-struck village,a signature line, a stray dog ...well...today I took my lesson from a tramp...one can actually be happy at the road-side, with tattered clothes, measly food and no roof over the head.

A smile so full ...so full of life...I wish I had my cam with me.

I need a flash card of the lesson.

Why I love spaces

Spaces...I ve always loved them.Be it the spaces as in the skies (back then, I was so much of a star-gazer),the spaces in my dwelling place ,the spaces between the words I type, the silence that lives flanking the musical notes or the spaces even in my relationships, for that matter.I love them for their very existence.And even more for the sense they make.Somehow I feel that spaces add more meaning and beauty , with their being so subtle yet so indispensable.

Speaking of my personal space...it has been my den,refuge, asylum ,haven.That is where I lick my wounds, heal them, reminisce good times, reflect or simply stare into the rough country I carry within.The place saves my sanity.

For me, a person is as rich as the people one has in his life.And as I see , my life has been bejeweled by very special people.Love simply grows with giving.The more thatz given ,therez always more to give.Thatz what I believe.

All that said, I still need my space, where even the soul thatz my skin will not have a say.

"Dont hold me too close for I would suffocate", says a would-be doctor.And my thoughts are so much with her.

And I somehow feel we are not alone and that there must be so many out there exalting space.And about those who think otherwise , I simply wonder how they can choke joyfully.

" You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.

You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.

Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.

But let there be spaces in your togetherness,

And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another but make not a bond of love:

Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.

Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.

Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,

Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.

For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.

And stand together, yet not too near together:

For the pillars of the temple stand apart,

And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow."

- Khalil Gibran, The prophet.